Thorns before the roses

I lived my entire life his ^ way, done everything to the best of my knowledge that God may love thee. And still nothing. It's as if I'm cursed or something. Non christian even have it better. Meaning some people my family included gave into their flesh, "excluding my brother Jason" didn't do the Lord's will yet they have someone. I'll be perfectly honest I want to give up and give into my flesh. It's so hard I get attacked daily. I want to save myself for marriage but I know I'm fighting a losing battle. My brothers tease me saying everyone does it, its just the world we live in. I want the feel to finally kiss a girl but I know when I can't take no more I have to keep going. Because when you prepare yourself for the worst the best always happens. In his service